Your intrepid blogger found this little book of terms on the health board chief's desk..
Conference - a dull day at a hot hotel, talking hot air, but it's not work and there's Black Forest Gateau.
Synergy- a really exciting word peppered through boring documents.
In synergy with - you have just been yoked together with a department that has nothing to do with you, wants nothing to do with you and which is sharing half your annual budget.
Consultation- the management have decided what they want-now the management will decide what you want.
Downsizing - you're all fired
Facilitator- that big 20 stone bloke with the earpiece
Synergy - a really exciting word peppered through boring documents.
Fit for the 21st century - a new building of plasterboard, half the needed size, but with a kettle.
Fit for purpose - An old building, given a lick of new paint, with a kettle.
Fit for use - An old building, given a lick of leftover paint, without a kettle.
The latest in computer technology - works if you switch it on and off a couple of times.
Merger - You're all fired.
Pay Rise - never heard of it.
Synergy - a really exciting word peppered through boring documents..
Powerpoint - the guy didn't know enough to write a paper on the subject, so he did some slides instead.
Public Meeting - held at 6 o'clock teatime, in a boarded up building, in the part of town where the police dogs go in twos.
Preference Scoring - can you guess which department we're shutting?
Rationalisation - you're all fired.
Re-organisation - half of you are fired. The other half are getting their pay cut.
Review - we tried to shut you down. You threw half bricks at us. We'll try that one again..
Synergy - a really exciting... ok, you get the idea..
